All Balls Don’t Bounce

Completely Random Sports Non Sequiturs From A Completely Random Hip Hop Head


Posted by hiphopmama on September 6, 2008

I just caught a new installment in my favorite series of commercials. (light sarcasm here) The Citizen Eco-Drive watch ads always feature athletes who are noticeably second-tier (or third, or fourth). The best ones were the first ones, with lines like, “Unstoppable: Sasha Cohen is.” No disrespect to Sasha – or any of the other athletes in the ads – but it’s not exactly a ringing endorsement, and the people they pick don’t usually evoke the word “unstoppable.” 

“Unstoppable: Nicole Vaidisova is.” Huh?

The latest one they just showed was: “Unstoppable: Paula Creamer is.” Now, I’m sure she’s a great golfer and has achieved more in life than I ever will, but it just comes across as so lame. I just looked up their list of current “ambassadors,” as they call their sponsors, and they include names like Kevin Pietersen (a cricket player, I believe), skiier Chemmy Alcott, and NHL player Dion Phaneuf. Their best one is Eli Manning, but they signed him on before he had accomplished anything, well before the Super Bowl run, so at the time he was still a notch below the top-tier endorsement – just Peyton Manning’s little brother. I’m sure they were shitting their pants when the Giants pulled off their upset of the Patriots last winter.

Further proof that commercials are for entertainment value only. I can’t imagine being inspired to buy most products after the ads I see for them on TV, especially these ones for Citizen Eco-Drive. 

“Fueled by light, it never needs a battery. It’s UNSTOPPABLE. Just like the people who wear it.”


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